Excerpts, Notes, Real Stuff

More Scandalousness and Impertinence … constantly updated

“They can take our Proust, and they can take our Camus, but they can never take our MAXIM!”

Burgher was one of the half dozen jailhouse lawyers who plied their trade in the law library ten hours a day. Men self-taught in the mechanics of the law with exactly the same chance of concisely stating a case as the proverbial infinite number of chimps sitting at an infinite number of typewriters had of producing Hamlet and Moby Dick on the same day.

Devens is a Federal Medical facility, the last repository for the blind, lame, psychotic, senile, wheel-chaired, dialysis tethered, sexually dangerous, AIDs ravaged, Hep C endangered, transplant awaiting, chronic bitchers, and a host of various, assorted, too scary to contemplate, disease-ridden inmates from around the country. The Federal Bureau of Prisons’ equivalent to the last stop on the short bus, an Island of Misfit Toys and Papa Geppetto has left the building.

There is a saying that you can be anyone or anything you want in prison. This may account for the statistically troubling abundance of incarcerated Navy SEALS

As the rosy fingers of dawn

Poke through the iron shutters

An’ the campus prepares to meet the day,

A sayin’ carries into

My head before the day’s din begins;

I hear it first as I rummage thro’ my locker,

“Yo! Morning Mudder’fucka!”

Hillbilly yentas: (n.) An unmistakable subset of Federal inmates; meth cookers of the Blue Ridge Mountains; recognizable by their John Brown beards, unruly hair, missing teeth; funny if unprovoked. Known to travel in packs while gossiping about everybody else in the prison.